|
In my practice I often get calls from parents about behaviors and other situations that their child is involved with. Although, it is impossible to decipher needs over the phone there are some questions that parents can ask about their child or family that may help to clarify when to seek professional help. Your decision about seeking therapy is a complicated and personal decision. There are some basic questions you can ask that will help in making this decision. First of all, ask yourself are the concerns impacting your child or family’s daily functioning? Does the child’s behaviors get in the way of making and keeping friends? Do the behaviors or mood interfere with his/her learning? Do the dynamics of the home create such strain that problems are avoided and go unsolved? In addition to these questions, look at how your child follows rules, accepts limits, and develops personal interests or their general attitude toward others. Have the concerns persisted longer the three months for more days than not? Answering yes to these questions or concerns about your child does not mean that counseling is needed but it suggests that counseling may be beneficial to your situation. In addition to exploring the above questions, examine if there are significant events that have happened in your family. There are some situations that suddenly onset that may require assistance. Don’t assume that personal setbacks, related to an event such as a death, divorce or disaster, will pass on it’s own. Although, many times they may resolve on their own with natural supports, a crisis allows an opportunity to make a tremendous amount of change and progress in a shorter period of time. Occasionally situational issues that are left unresolved can either manifest in a more significant long-term disorder (phobias, anxiety or depression) or impact one’s view of the world in a negative manner. While at other times there is no clear event to the behavioral/emotional struggles, there may be many factors involved with such circumstances ranging from a medical condition to children not wanting to disappoint their parent or not knowing how to communicate their needs in an appropriate manner. Asking for help can be difficult. Some people view seeking mental health treatment as a sign of a weak character or they don’t want others to think that they are inadequate. Rest assured I have been working as a therapist for over fifteen years and rarely do I come across a person struggling with depression, anxiety, ADHD or another concern who has a weak character. Usually just the opposite is true. I find that they are determined, resilient and motivated. Sometimes to make significant change, it may take the presence of a neutral third party to offer a different perspective in a way that we may not see on our own, accept our fears or worries with out being judged or to act as a sounding board. However, stigma often contributes to needless pain and suffering as it delays treatment. There may be some resistance by many middle school and high school aged youth who say they won’t talk to a therapist. Remember, change is very hard and some older children will likely resist seeking assistance for personal issues. Don’t be deterred by this. I have rarely had a child/adolescent in my office that remains silent over five minutes or refuses to come into the office. In fact what I actually see is that the highly resistant child is often the one who talks the most and works on their issues diligently. If you decide to seek help from a therapist do not hesitate to inquire about their credentials, years of experiences, qualifications to meet your needs, how they determine length of treatment and how a plan of care is developed. You can also inquire about fees, but be aware that most insurance providers will cover the cost of this medical expense. Also most importantly, evaluate if the match between you, your family and the therapist, is a good fit. It is OK to try out a few sessions and if you are not feeling a good connection with the therapist to let them know and to seek another professional. This relationship is a key element that facilitates change. Making the decision to seek help from a mental health professional is a personal decision, but you are not alone in your need for assistance. Nationally, when one looks at statistics about the prevalence of emotional/behavioral problems that our children face it can be overwhelming. According to the Center for Mental Health Services suicide is the third leading cause of death for fifteen to twenty four year olds and the sixth leading cause of death among five to fifteen year olds. CMHS also has indicated that two thirds of children with mental health problems do not get the help that they need. Furthermore, the children’s defense council has indicated that every day six children commit suicide, 2,833 children drop out of school and 6,042 children are arrested. Attending counseling may help you or your family build tools that may facilitate movement toward your goals. |
Lincoln Children's Therapy
1650 S. 70th Street - Suite 202
Lincoln, Nebraska 68506
phone: 402-805-0879
pries@lincolnchildrenstherapy.com